Monday, August 3, 2009

Happy Birthday Martha

Just saying happy birthday because Martha is an Etsy lover ...yay!!!!! Not going to say how old she is. She's older than me and that's all I care about.
I am going to reprise an earlier post about her, that I wrote.

How Martha Makes a Peanut Butter Sandwich:

1. Grind wheat, make bread dough and bake bread.
2. Get top quality, hard to find, no preservative, hand made by nuns or monks using peanuts too good even for squirrels, peanut buerre.
3. Get jar of last summer's home made strawberry preserves that you slaved over and gave to all your friends instead of gifts at last Christmas.
4. Cut cooled bread into nice thick slices.
5. Generously spread peanut buerre on one piece of bread. Sprinkle nutmeg on top.
6. Spread jam on the other slice of bread. Top with fresh strawberries cut into rose florettes.
7. Arrange bread on an attractive plate, side by side. Top with melted Ghirardeli chocolate and add a sprig of mint on the side of the plate.
8. Enjoy with a friend.

...and a couple of new ones

If Martha Stewart was a zombie:

The Martha Stewart zombie would remove her victims brains (going after only the best quality brains) with her well oiled garden shears, and transport the aquired brains in a hande made brain carrying tote (from Etsy)to her well appointed, beautiful kitchen, and eat them out of custom earthenware brain bowls (from Etsy). They would be delicately seasoned with nutmeg and a touch of lemon for a little extra tang.

The Martha Stewart Computer Virus:

A self made virus, and entrepeneur of a virus. Very curious, and inquisitive. Seeks out files and finds ways to make them more efficient and appealing. Co-ordinates colors of the fonts and images on your screen so that it matches your decor. If found by your anti virus program and put into the vault, it only stays there a short time, and comes back stronger than ever.

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